It was Winnie The Pooh or the Honey Monster, and I don't appreciate the vaguely paedophilic overtones of the Honey Monster

Look at this - children are starving.

On the 30th March 2011 I had the privilege of attending a self-described art and comedy night at The Highlight Club in Leeds. The event was called Super Hybrid and it was indeed just that. I walked in to see a man on stage 'struggling' through a joke, taking roughly six minutes to tell a one-sentence joke followed by a brief punchline. I laughed. The next stop was into one of the club's booths which had been appropriated by artists, specifically the one which invited audience participation. In this booth groups of 3-5 people were given various tasks such as drawing whilst listening to a vinyl record, engaging in robotic dog races and guessing the made-up names of traditional biscuits. I drew an awesome bicycle, letting the world know exactly where it stands in relation to my icy-cool demeanour. 

Neither myself nor my bike require internal organs.

Typically during an evening I'll urinate several times, and it was during a trip to the bathroom that I learned the toilet attendant was actually a tutor from Leeds University engaged in performance art for the duration of the night. I gave him a pound and he gave me a Chupa Chup, but only after we had discussed the recent raising of tuition fees and how it would affect both our worlds. Once I had fully appreciated this amazing display of dedication he sprayed me with Beyoncé Knowles' latest scent and left me smelling like a pre-pubescent girls' sleepover. Eventually the promised 'Main Event' began, which consisted of a person dripping honey onto a plastic sheet, spelling Super Hybrid, then adding white paint before folding it over into itself. It was pretty fascinating to watch, although I'm not sure if it's entirely because of deep-rooted appreciation of her message; I was more excited simply by the fact that she was doing it. My suspicion of shallow appreciation was further solidified by the next act, in which a person read poetry aloud whilst inviting audience members to approach him and throw one of the cream pies he had laid out around him into his face. Did I participate?

Fuck yeah.